How to find the real you

  • September 22, 2022

Let me start by informing you right off the bat that what is written here is part blog post, and part dreamweaving exercise. What I want to you think about is the answer to the question "Who is the real me?". Please keep in mind that whatever answer you come up with can also be applied to someone else, for example the young woman pictured above. There are no right and wrong answers. There is only your answer and what you arrive at when you reach the end of what I write here. Are we ready?

Now I'm sure you've heard the advice which is often said, or which appears in memes such as:

  • Know yourself.
  • Look within.
  • Love yourself.
  • Work on yourself.

But what does it mean? Furthermore, are any of these things above really possible?

We know that consciousness exists. Consciousness is also the basis of all existence. But see there is also physical existence, which is based on the energy vibration and waves. Therefore existence also involves a relationship between consciousness and energy which gives us existence and physical existence. Without confusing the matter too much, it's enough to say that you exist on many different levels and dimensions, as do I, as does everyone else. So let's look at these different levels of existence. (As I don't know anything about you I'm going to refer to the young woman pictured above as an example).

Physical appearance
What you see when you look at another human being is another physical body - man, woman, old, young, tall, short, slim, fat, and so on. You see yourself in much the same terms. This is the most basic dimension. What you have here is a young woman with blonde hair who is probably slim and rather physically attractive. This is the most basic, fundamental level - purely physical - the level at which people eye each other up and teenagers give each other a score out of 10.
Then what you have when you meet someone, or what interests you is their psychology, how do they think, their demeanour, and how they come across to you. Are they happy? Depressed? Confrontational? Friendly? Open-minded? Intelligent? Ignorant? Some people in therapy are prominent on this level, and are preoccupied with their own issues, depressions, highs, lows, fears, anxieties, loneliness, hopes, and so on. This is somewhat more real, because this is a level which is closely related to trauma, so this is more the real you and the real someone else.
Social role
Then you have another level or dimension which relates to societal role or function and which also gives us clues towards their perspective, from such things as education, background, occupation, interests, and whether they are wealthy or poor, working or retired, or unemployed, and so on. Note that only in some cases you can get a sense of who someone really is on this level, but often it's no indication of who someone is, because, you know, circumstances and opportunities in life.
Then you have another level or variable which relates to worldview, beliefs, interests, and this also influences their perspective and how they come across. The exact same thing can be said about you. What belief systems and doctrines do you believe in? What ideology do you follow? What do you value and what do you feel is important or what matters in life?
This is a level where it starts to get interesting. When you look into another person's eyes what you will find, invariably, is another person looking back at you, with a similar physical body, functioning on the basis of some psychology, social role, worldview and going through experiences in life which are just as unique and individual as your experiences. This is what the spiritually minded and religious among us call a soul, or spirit. But fundamentally you see another soul, another being just like you. You see someone who is, in reality, not that much different to you and who you are when you put all the other minor differences aside.
So we take this to another level or dimension and we have what I can describe as reflection, and this is based on the understanding that when you look at another person you're essentially seeing a different version of who you are. The only thing which makes you different from someone else or that other person is trauma, or death, and being reborn into a new life. If we're going to get into actual reality and what's really real then it's understanding that we are all different physical manifestations of the same collective consciousness. We are all part of one awareness which takes on a vast multiplicity of different physical forms, each one of them unique and individual and unless all the other physical forms.

So who is the real you now?

As you can see you exist on so many different levels, as does everyone else. So what about your answer now? What are you prepared to settle on? Where can you point a finger and say to yourself "Yes, this is the real me."? How do you determine whether someone else is real or not? What basis do you have for being able to figure that out?

You see there's also this..


Here's another exercise for you. Above, from left to right, you have six black and white images, but you will only be able to see three images and three forms. So from left to right, do you see:

  • a black Rubin vase or two white faces in profile facing each other?
  • a black silhouette of a tree and birds or a white gorilla and lioness facing each other?
  • a black and white image of a woman's face or a black silhouette of a man playing a saxophone?

Now if you spend a few minutes looking at the images from left to right and back again, you should be able to see six images. In each case you're always looking at two images in one. But also in each image, which is actually two images in one, one image will be the foreground, and will be defined by the other image being the background. For example on the left you will only see the two white faces in profile facing each other if you accept the black Rubin vase as background and choose to ignore it. The same in the centre where you see a gorilla and lioness only if you accept the tree and birds as the background. Only on the right you see a woman's face if you choose to ignore the black silhouette of the man playing the saxophone.

Consciousness and space

What I want to point out here is that consciousness and space are one and the same thing. In reality there is only consciousness but when you have physical form - all physicality is based on energy and energy vibrations - consciousness becomes space which defines the physical form and gives it its reality. Both consciousness and space go on and on and on infinitely throughout the universe. Neither can be understood, conceived, defined, explained, or fully known.

To make this simple the way I explain this - and please keep in mind you don't have to believe what I'm saying just because I'm writing it here - is that consciousness is information and the basis of existence, and space is emptiness, reality, non-existence, and is what makes both consciousness and physical form real. So just like in the images above you have a physical form from which you have consciousness (the image you saw) and the space or emptiness around the form which gave it its reality. The image on the screen didn't change, what changed was your perspective and how you chose to perceive the image.

I know this is starting to get complex, but see being a human being and experiencing life as a human being is a complex process. This is why such advice as 'look within' or 'know yourself' is ridiculous to the point of being meaningless. There is no way you can break down your entire life experience, from childhood onwards, into a few neat soundbites. No matter how you write your CV or resume, that document will never be able to properly convey who you really are to anyone else. What I'm suggesting here is believe less, assume less, and investigate for yourself as much as you possibly can.

Nothing has changed since the start here. Your answer to 'Who am I really?' is the only acceptable answer.

Creative Law

Creative Law

This is something else I want you to keep in mind. Dreamweaving is traditionally based on Natural Law, but in terms of Qultura dreamweaving is based on Creative Law. This means you learn about dreamweaving by becoming familiar with Qultura methodology. Creative Law is a simplification of Natural Law, and is about the relationship of energy and physical form to consciousness and space.

All physical existence is based on energy, which unlike consciousness (and space) is finite, constant and cannot be created or destroyed. All energy is a matter of cycle, wave, frequency, and how it relates to consciousness (and space). The higher the frequency of energy, the shorter the wave or cycle, and the closer the relationship is to emptiness, space and trauma. Therefore the lower the frequency of energy, the longer the wave or cycle, and the closer the relationship is between energy and consciousness and drama. This is essentially Creative Law.

But then you have time, and time perception, and both time and time perception is closely related to physical form, physical action, and space. Both time and space are human concepts and you measure time against your experience of an environment which is essentially what life is all about. This gives us another duality or polarity. The more traumatic your experience of life is, the slower time will pass relative to your environment, and the more dramatic or conscious your experience of life is, the faster time will appear to pass relative to both your experience and environment. This is also Creative Law. I'm sure you've heard the saying 'Time flies when you're having fun'.

Now think back to the start when we were looking at the six different levels or dimensions of being human - physical appearance, psychology, worldview, meta-physics and reflection - at least three of those dimensions will be dependent or closely associated with time. For example your physical appearance and changes in your physical body are very closely associated with time and the ageing process, which is a traumatic process. Consider that your physical body is changing all the time as you get older. Also consider how quickly you heal from physical trauma, such as a bruise, a cut, or spraining your wrist or ankle, relative to how much longer it takes for you to heal and recover from emotional or psychological trauma.

Here I also want to give you a shortcut or cheat code to Qultura methodology, which I spent 20 years developing. If you go to the 'Learn' section and find Qultura methodology, go to the second of the four components 'Universal principles' and start there. What you find are the four universal principles and original Qultura methodology on a single webpage.


The polar opposites of love and death

So let's now move on from Creative Law and get into what is probably the most important duality or polarity you will ever experience - love and death. Please keep in mind that Creative Law is scientific proof you need of reincarnation and karma. This is what makes love and death polar opposites, simply because death, life and love are the three inseparable aspects of human existence. Now you might have heard that love is opposite to either hate or fear, but the reality is that the love is opposite to death.

Now you can think of love as a completely different level, or even a whole spectrum of different levels, which all existence beyond the six levels or dimensions we were dealing with at the start - physical appearance, psychology, social role, worldview, and so on. As love is a purely conscious experience, you can even think of or create many more different levels - sympathy, empathy, enjoyment, devotion, attraction, kindness, humanity, and so on and so forth. Love is conscious because it is love that takes on many different physical forms, for example kindness, friendship, romantic love, love between members of a family, a love of certain activities, a love of different foods, the love of God or a deity, and so on.

Coming back to the central question and finding the 'real' you, you could see yourself as a hungry ghost born into a physical body and experiencing life, going through all the activities and motions, taking on roles, simply because you are hungry and have a need for acceptance, acknowledgement, recognition, and to experience love. Consider that being hungry for love is not quite the same as being hungry for food, is it? If you're hungry for food you can eat and your hunger will be satiated. But love is not like that, because love is conscious, not physical, and it is also timeless. Consider that you can be friends with someone and not see them for say 10 years, but when you meet up again it's just like old times and the absence no longer matters.

You see we can flip this situation a complete 180 degrees and consider what happens when someone you love dies, and you are left with emptiness and grief and a sense of loss simply because that person is no longer around. It doesn't even have to be another human being, it can be a pet such as a cat or a dog. The grieving process is just the same.

That sense of loss you experience when someone close to you dies is very real and often never goes away. This is because - taking this a few levels or dimensions further - we are all part of the same collective consciousness that is the universe, we are all here to experience life in a way which gives us certain unique experiences to resolve karma. We all have certain experiences we have a very deep and fundamental desire to go through and experience, and while we can go through some experiences on our own, there are other experiences which we can only go through by finding someone else and sharing experiences with them. Much of what love is really all about is being with someone who can lead you to those experiences which you cannot find on your own.


You are not marginalized in any way

So we come to the next point I wish to make here. You are not marginalized in any way. Understand that your perspective on life, your experiences of life, and the insight you bring to your environment is special, it's unique, and it is fundamental to the trajectory of human evolution. But see you have been conditioned to believe that you're not special, that you're not unique, and you've been labelled and categorized by modern mainstream cultural and social values almost as efficiently as a can of baked beans on a supermarket shelf.

We've been conditioned to believe that human existence can be contained on just four levels or dimensions - physical appearance, psychology, social role and worldview. Take a step back and think about this. Modern culture and the modern social and cultural values we are taught are not modern at all, but traditional and are based on purely physical, material and financial values. Get an education, get a job, make money, go shopping, spend money, consume, fuck each other, consume some more, go back to work. We are essentially enslaved to ideology and dogma by hierarchy, authority and tradition and quite simply this is not enough for a fulfilling, meaningful and even healthy lifestyle or life experience. Not even close.

What we are doing, collectively, is tossing aside hundreds of thousands of years of individual human experience and creativity just to consume all the finite natural resources of this planet and transform it all into toxic waste for the sake of tradition and corporate profit. What I want to point out is that trying to contain all your life experience and live on just these four dimensions of human existence is neither natural nor is it sustainable. We are human beings, the last surviving species of hominid ape, we evolve naturally through community, cultural development and through diversity of individual human life experience. Modern mainstream culture is a cheap and tacky imitation of what being naturally human is really all about.

Now take a step back and think about this. Consider the possibility that reincarnation and karma is real. Consider that your life is just one life cycle in an eternal cosmic vibration, which is made up of many previous lives, and looking into the future, many more future lives. Are you really sure that your dream, or your greatest wish, is to be constantly reborn into a life where you are conditioned to serve a contrived, made up economy through education, hard work, and mindless consumption over and over and over again into all eternity?

Make no mistake trying to conform to, or live up to mainstream social and cultural values on the basis of just your Ego is an incredibly traumatic experience and undertaking. You're taking on enormous amounts of stress, getting yourself involved in regular amounts of friction, conflict which you can only make easier by deceiving yourself, other people or both, and there's little or no payoff or reward at the end. This is why people get involved in art, surrealism, body piercing, recreational drug use, pornography, clubbing, sexual permissiveness, BDSM, music, the performing arts, dance, extreme sports, tattooing, and so on. What do all these things have in common? They are all attempts at healing through trying to reclaim individual human experience and also widening the diversity of individual life experiences.


So where is the 'real' you?

So finally we come back to the central question - who is the real you? How do you define your reality? What is the single most important aspect of your being and your life experience? What is it that you want other people to know about you?

You might know the answer. You might not. You might have more than one answer. It doesn't matter. You can have a thought or an idea in a couple of seconds. Even if you feel you have wasted 10, 20, or more years of your life it doesn't matter because you still have time to find the answer, or at least one answer.

Understand that the universe and Creation is never a done deal. Creativity and interaction is a continuous, eternal process. This means not just that there is no perfection, it also means that there are no right and wrong answers because at the end of the day everything turns out to be a possibility. History is either a possibility or a story. We understand reality far less than we think we do and explore possibilities nowhere near enough. This world is a living mystery. Our birth, our death, our being in the moment, these are all mysteries. They are portals, opportunities for exploration of self and other and an infinite number of different experiences and sensations.

The human imagination is a powerful resource, especially when it's backed up with environmental awareness. Understand that on a fundamental level life is a system of keys and doors, and dreamweaving done right is a key which can open for you very many doors, but it is also a tool for empowerment and hope for the human enterprise. Our culture and mainstream societal values kill both hope and empowerment and take it away from us and forces us into the role of consumers, with shitty products and even shitter ideals, ideals for which we have to grovel and struggle for. We need to get beyond all that and the way to get past all that is by becoming our real, authentic selves.

The hour is late, the clock is ticking, and we will be judged very harshly if we screw this all up. Our inheritance is millions of lives lived successfully over a million years of successful relationships with the natural world. The challenge is with us, those who are living, so that those who are yet to be born have somewhere to place their feet and a sky to walk under. Let's not throw this away by prostituting ourselves to mindless, moronic ideologies. Let's not hand over control of our communities and society to the least among us.

Claim your place in the sun and move forward into the light. The tools are there. The path exists and it is trodden. You simply have to turn your back on a culture that is impotent and dead, get with a program of a living world, take your place in a vibrant community, and walk your footsteps along that trodden path.

About Qultura

Qultura is a developing mystical community resource which is both an alternative dream weaving community and a Human Library project. Centred in Nine Elms, London we offer free access to Qultura methodology, the Qultura community and regularly scheduled Human Library events. Through what we do we offer opportunities to develop consciousness, mindfulness and community to anyone interested in exploring and developing ways of living alternative to modern mainstream social and cultural values.