When your heartbeat drives you mad

  • September 29, 2022

"Well here you go again, you say you want your freedom
Well who am I to keep you down?
It's only right that you should play it the way you feel it
But listen carefully to the sound
Of the loneliness, like a heartbeat drives you mad
In the stillness of remembering what you had
And what you lost
And what you had
And what you lost

Oh thunder only happens when it's raining
Players only love you when they're playing
Say women they will come and they will go
When the rain washes you clean you'll know
You'll know...."

Fleetwood Mac, 'Dreams'

'Dreams' was a song Fleetwood Mac lead singer Stevie Nicks wrote to bandmate and partner Lindsey Buckingham, a guitarist, during their break up. It was in response to his song to her, on the same 'Rumours' album titled 'Go your own way'. During the recording of the album in 1976 there were two break ups going on between members of Fleetwood Mac, and 'Dreams' is one of the songs written.

However the first verse and chorus of this song fairly neatly illustrates the dreamweaving process. Like yoga, dreamweaving is essentially something you get involved in to work your way back to mindfulness and unity. But while yoga is based on eastern cosmology and religions such as Hinduism, and involves physical exercises, dreamweaving is based far more on language and ritual magic. Furthermore dreamweaving is something we all do naturally anyway, but without the mystical or environmental awareness.

If you listen to the song (note that clicking the link in the citation opens a new window or tab taking you to the official music video on YouTube) you will find that the song is about someone wanting to end a relationship and move on. In other words its about someone who is seeking change in some way and who wants to move on. The 'heartbeat driving you mad' is the loneliness, in other words trauma, which we experience in many different ways in our lives, not just loneliness and when relationships fail, but bereavement, loss, conflict, friction, ageing, sickness, doubt, fear, anxiety, worry and death. Consider that you could be in the same situation if you're unhappy at work and want to leave your job and move on to find another one or stop working. You're still ending a relationship and wanting to move on.

In fact whenever you're making a choice or decision what you're essentially doing is dreamweaving. You're essentially trying to predict the future on the basis of memory or past experience, going through the different options and variables. Dreamweaving brings together the two great powers of human living existence - the power of the word and also the power of choice - and uses them as a tool to create change and a new reality, which is essentially magic. You understand that words can be powerful, very powerful. There are people out there who are still struggling emotionally and psychologically with words, either their own words or someone else's words, said last week, last month, last year or even 10, 20, 30 years ago. Then you have the power of choice, which is equally powerful. We all understand that choice always comes with consequences.


Confusion between reality and possibility

But see power is only useful when you know how to use it and actually understand what power is. Most people don't understand power, which is all about relationship, and many believe that power is something you can possess which isn't true. This is where we get to the difference between political power and natural or organic power. Political power is all about authority and control and having power over others. Natural or organic power is all about not being in control, but understanding that the power always lies in the environment. This brings us to the key issue of humanity in general, the confusion between reality and possibility, confusion between perception and conception, and the inability to distinguish what is really real and what is only imaginary real.

This is such a widespread issue I feel I don't need to explain it. I'm sure you understand it just as well and can think of your own examples.

I'm sure you can think of a situation when you've been faced with a choice and not known which option to choose. I'm sure you've also made choices which haven't turned out the way you thought they would turn out. I'm also sure that you've been in situations where you don't know what to say or how to express yourself. I'm also sure that you've said the wrong thing to the wrong person or the wrong time, maybe you've rubbed someone up the wrong way, or something you've said cost you a relationship or a job. I'm sure that you've been rubbed up the wrong way, or upset by other people, either over the things they've said or the choices they've made. I know I have. When you stop and think about it life seems to be a never ending sequence of mistakes, failures, cock ups, misunderstandings, conflicts, confusion, getting the wrong end of the stick with a few fuck offs thrown in for good measure.

But see this is how trauma usually plays out in our lives. Understand that the universe is centred around equilibrium, nature is all about harmony, and life is no different from water - it's meant to flow smoothly and effortlessly. Therefore any choice you are forced to make, or conflict, or friction is a disruption which disturbs your natural equilibrium, the flow of your life, and takes you out of your natural state of mindfulness. All choices, conflicts and friction attack your self-esteem and undermine your self-confidence. If you lack self-confidence you will experience doubts, fears and you will make mistakes and say the wrong thing through hesitation and fumbling. But then again if you do have self-confidence you can still make mistakes through having the wrong beliefs, doing the wrong thing, and assuming that you know when you don't know at all.

"Well here I go again, I see the crystal visions
I keep my visions to myself
It's only me who wants to wrap around your dreams, and
Have you any dreams you'd like to sell?
Dreams of loneliness, like a heartbeat drives you mad
In the stillness of remembering what you had
And what you lost
And what you had
And what you lost..."

Fleetwood Mac, 'Dreams'

What if there's no right and wrong in reality?

Think about this. Let's dig deeper into one of Mankind's greatest issues and possibly one of your most persistent issues. Such things as right and wrong, morality, mistakes, fault, blame, are human concepts and do not exist in reality. Have you ever seen a badly designed cloud? Has water ever failed to make you wet? Being right or being wrong is only a matter of opinion, just like making mistakes is only a matter of opinion. It is only your assumption that there is such a thing as right and wrong, that there can be mistakes, and the only way you think that way is because you've been taught or told everything is that way by other people.

This is just my observation but believing in such things as right and wrong, mistakes, fault, blame, and even personal responsibility is the root cause of many people completely messing up their lives. Not only do such beliefs lead to saying things and making choices which are inappropriate, but such beliefs also shut you down, shut you up and stifle that what is most natural about you, your humanity, your creativity and your empathy. While you can tell a story about the things you did in your life, you can also tell another story about all the things you didn't say and didn't do, the opportunities you didn't take, and all the times you didn't give yourself or other people chances. You probably know this alternative story just as well as I do. The title of that story is 'Regrets'.

You see believing in moral reasoning and right and wrong distorts your whole perspective and gives you a problem which cannot ever be solved. There is no global standard as to what is right and what is wrong, it is entirely arbitrary. No matter how you define good and bad, good and evil, and right and wrong, someone somewhere will always disagree with you. You will always run into conflict with someone else. There will always be disagreement, discord, friction and conflict. But see if you are in tune with your humanity, and understand the importance of empathy, and are prepared to develop on your creativity through exploration, experimentation and learning, you have no further need for right and wrong and moral reasoning.

Furthermore if you discard moral reasoning, and focus much more on saying what you feel at the time and doing what you feel is appropriate at the time, then the whole anxiety and doubt over whether you are right or wrong simply vanishes into thin air. Then what you are left with is what is - the reality and the possibility - and also with truth and illusion. Even if you say something and it doesn't work, or you do something and it turns out disastrously, you know that you need to try something different and you have the knowledge that eventually, it will all come out in the wash and you will end up knowing what is real and what isn't simply by trusting your intuition and 'feeling' the situation.

This is what dreamweaving is really all about.


Finding or creating the reality from exploring possibility

Dreamweaving is all about finding or creating a new reality through exploring the different possibilities. It is about making connections and finding ways to connect all your thoughts, feelings, emotions, ideas, dreams, visions, half-baked notions, through expressing them out into the environment and seeing what comes back to you or how the environment responds.

As dreamweaving is dramatic in nature it's all about the narrative and telling stories, so therefore it's not just social interaction, and discussion, it can also be about story telling, creative writing, different forms of creativity, art, music, theatre, drama workshops, role play, creative writing, psychometry, dream interpretations, sharing experiences, and sharing individual human perspectives.

Dreamweaving is based on mysticism and Natural Law. It's also based on magic, specifically ritual magic and is an ancient practice dating back thousands of years, arising our of shamanism and practices such as mirroring which was practised by druids at sacred sites such as Stonehenge and Chislehurst Caves. This might seem complicated and difficult but it really isn't. Mysticism is essentially anything you don't know or understand. Natural Law is about being and doing and the principles of being and doing. Magic is simply knowing how things work in reality and being able to create change and connect to your environment through understanding very simple mystical principles.

But what dreamweaving gives you is a much deeper awareness of self and your environment - including your social environment because other people are also part of your environment. This deeper awareness of self and other not only supports a more conscious lifestyle and simplifies many aspects of your life by removing much of the anxieties, fears and doubts, dreamweaving can also be used in a number of different ways. Dreamweaving can be powerfully effective as a form of healing and recovery from trauma, beneficial in terms of mental health, and is also a powerful tool for community building, development of new culture, social design, and consensus building.

"Oh thunder only happens when it's raining
Players only love you when they're playing...."

Fleetwood Mac, 'Dreams'

A community within a community

Which brings us to the subject of Qultura. Qultura is all about dreamweaving and is a developing, alternative community centred in Nine Elms, London. While dreamweaving has created far more utopian communities in places such as Auroville in Tamil Nadu in India, and Arcosante and Sacromonte, Qultura is a part of the existing local community infrastructure in Nine Elms and exists as a developing mystical community for those who are interested in dreamweaving and a far more conscious way of living.

Many different people have passed through the Qultura community and it is possible to be a part of our alternative community without needing to uproot yourself or change that much about your current lifestyle. As a developing community Qultura offers you completely free access to resources where you can learn about dreamweaving and its different aspects, Qultura methodology which is essentially a self-study course in dreamweaving which takes you quickly right up to being able to participate in our regular dreamweaving meetings, workshops and sessions. There is also a Community Message Board attached to this website which is free to join and participate in, so this comes down to nothing more than creating an alternative aspect to your current or existing lifestyle where you can be part of the Qultura community and still be a part of the wider community.

Please keep in mind that the Qultura community is an alternative community with different Community Standards to what is acceptable out in the wider community. You can only do dreamweaving within a community environment, and the social environment needs to be open, welcoming, supportive, and non-judgmental. As dreamweaving is a dramatic process it's based on narratives, sharing stories, thoughts, ideas, experiences, and being free to express such things outwards into an open, supportive, empathic social environment. Understand this is a community which is centred around empathy, community, diversity and the empowerment of individual human experience. Judgmental, bigoted and opinionated people are not welcome and this is not the community to push your religious, political or commercial interests.

Participation is key

Currently I'm the Administrator on the Community Message Board and I'm usually the Community Facilitator present at all scheduled dreamweaving meetings and workshops and being a mystic and shaman I'm always on hand to answer questions, provide mystical insight, develop workshops and facilitate the meetings. However this doesn't mean that you turn up to find me giving a presentation, a talk, a lecture or teaching. That's not how dreamweaving works and I recommend reading the related blog post 'How to find the real you' to understand why.

All dreamweaving meetings and workshops follow the mystical principle of trauma moving into karma. If you hit a bell with a hammer the bell will always ring. If you drop a stone into water you will always get a splash, then waves, then ripples. Similarly at Qultura meetings, workshops, and also on the Community Message Board, narratives, thoughts, ideas, feelings, experiences, and so on are always expressed outwards into the environment. This is very similar to what you understand as brainstorming. At meetings it's enough to turn up with a narrative, a story, an experience, something to share with the community. This means that everyone who turns up at a meeting gets listened to, everyone gets heard, everyone has a say, and all perspectives carry the exact same value. The exact same principles apply on the Community Message Board. If in doubt post, and what you post will be read by someone and ultimately by the community.

About Qultura

Qultura is a developing mystical community resource which is both an alternative dream weaving community and a Human Library project. Centred in Nine Elms, London we offer free access to Qultura methodology, the Qultura community and regularly scheduled Human Library events. Through what we do we offer opportunities to develop consciousness, mindfulness and community to anyone interested in exploring and developing ways of living alternative to modern mainstream social and cultural values.